The Charge of the Well Connected: Captain Montagu Dowbiggin Scandal

In the midst of the Crimean War disasters Britain’s Minister of War Lord Panmure had been embarrassed by the public revelation of a telegraph he sent on behalf of his protege, Captain Montagu Dowbiggin, to General  [Lord Raglan] "I recommend young Dowbiggin to your attention if he is fit, and you have a vacancy.” 

Half a league onward to tragedy

Rode the 600 hundred, lancers all,

‘Gainst cannon they made their charge,

Only to see the bravest fall.

When Raglan died and England wept,
Her sons at Redan slain,
When widows cried and statesmen groped
For generals, all in vain—

What did our War-Lord, Panmure bold,
Proclaim with statesman’s care?
Not plans, reforms, nor soldiers’ bread,
But—“Look to my nephew there!”

The wires ran quick, the message short,
A cryptic, shameless job;
No talk of loss, no thought of war—
Just “Look after Dowb.”

O noble Lords with reforming airs,
Whose schemes are writ in sand,
You patch the army’s gaping wounds
With favours close at hand.

And Palmerston, with grin urbane,
Declared before the House:
“That note does credit to my friend—
Nepotism’s not a louse!”

So let the mothers dry their eyes,
And Britain bite her lip;
The Crimean dead may rot in peace—
Young Dowb has got his post.

Footnote: Raglan died in Crimea after the failure of his attack on Sevastopol. Montagu died shortly after at age 31 having received the Croix d’Honneur from France.