Soccer is the UN of sports. It has a storied past. It represents many good and virtuous things in the world. But it is now a swamp of corruption, cynicism and bad people. To paraphrase the Hunter S. Thompson expression, soccer is a cruel and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free, and good men die like dogs. 

There is an old quote that goes, ‘For my friend everything. For my enemies the law.’ New “hate speech” laws have been enacted to trip up those who, like Michael Richards of Seinfeld fame, are made to disappear for upsetting audience members unhinged by comedy. It doesn’t stop there. New Canadian laws talk about multi-million dollar fines for denying the climate ruse.

Old-timers like the “human element” romanticism of allowing blown calls, like the phantom tag at second base or the football barely crossing the goal line in a pile of bodies. They want the free flow of the game not to be interrupted (unless by a fight). They insist that lengthy delays, like betting commercials, ruin the sport’s purity.

What do you say to keep fans coming back even when they know the inevitable result is tanking? Enter recreational gambling. The NFL has floated its boat on pools, fantasy and illegal wagering for years. Its TV numbers would plummet without people tuning in to see how their fantasy teams, props bets and parlays are doing. The other leagues want that action, too.

The political water carriers don’t care for Clark’s white, straight act. They would return the WNBA to what it’s always been, a subsidized pet project for progressives in media and government. Perhaps the most on-the-nose indicator about the WNBA’s image is that Toronto is finally getting a team in the league. It’s a non-binary marriage made in progressive heaven.

“Team Up For The Cup” is the sort of pablum notion you get from focus-group people who drop in for the Final after spending the winter darning socks or attending NDP rallies. People we know actually believe it’s a government commercial. Even in the age of “Sinbad” Trudeau, this is inauthentic to the nth degree.

Auston Matthews’ commitment to Toronto means that a number of teams who’ve been delaying bold moves and hoarding trade bait in anticipation of his potential trade or UFA market can now move to Plan B. There were a number of U.S. teams poised to offer the Leafs the moon and stars— NHL version— at the trade deadline or to sign him next summer. This should now tell them to move on.

As long as you’re willing to re-locate frequently the job of NHL head coach has a fair degree of job security. Even when you get fired it seems there’s a ready appetite in some other town for a skill set you have just failed at.

In today’s sports journalism, where social media has replaced newspapers, scoops are governed by a protocol. There are the heralds— in the NHL it’s currently Johnston and Dreger— and then there are the disseminators. The days of a rabble of reporters all scrambling to get a story bigger than who-will-play-in-tonight’s-game are gone. Today, it’s a very narrow funnel for scoops.

Sure, Montreal had seen recent riots after Stanley Cups ,but there was little element of politics in the drunken behaviour. Not Vancouver. Not in 2011. Seeing the random anarchists and looters on Granville and Robson Streets the question was, “Why were the cops and elected officials so unprepared?” Because we are Canadian and we trust.

When this first-round ends in ignominy there will be plenty of questions from Keith Pelley, newly installed at the top of the MLSE pyramid. Such as, why should I keep this management team that teases Waygu beef in-season but delivers ground chuck in the playoffs? It’s long been said that the league the Leafs have been built for doesn’t exist in the postseason. So why keep pretending it does? 

The Arizona Republic naively fawned on Bettman for his many attempts to save the team. In fact, they were just attempts to buttress his grip on the league. While the Coyotes may have been a mess, Bettman has succeeded in preserving the investments of most of the business people who bought his NHL business prospectus.

The apogee of the trial was, of course, coarse actor O.J. not being able to put on the glove (if it don’t fit you must acquit). The stunned look on prosecutor Marcia Clark’s face was mint. For the hyper-liberal, mostly black  L.A. jury that was all they needed to cement the not-guilty verdict. CNN reverberated for weeks on the sugar high from the trial.

Women’s sports has been in search of a marketable messiah to change women’s sports from ESPN hype to mainstream. Too many fans were turned off by the strident soccer player  Megan Rapinioe and WNBA star Britney Griner who made every game into a referendum on the latest #LGBTQ talking points. But Clark is different.

The best part is that Mike’s show is he will talk to anyone civilly without inserting himself into the show, especially if the craic is good. We discussed that at length in Ep.1464 about the current media mania for demonizing people with whom we disagree. 

The greatest complaint about sports betting from people who don’t know a parlay from a chardonnay is the effect on young people seeing so much on wagering. Alert: In every jurisdiction it is illegal for anyone under 18 (sometimes 19) to bet legally. The image of 11-year-olds betting props on their own phones is a canard.

We are in a holding pattern as the media demand answers. Such as, will the biggest signing in the sport’s history now face federal charges that prohibit wiring money to an unlicensed sports gambling operation? Will MLB suspend him for life for dealing with an illegal gambling operation? Why is Ohtani’s name on the money trail? Also, are these payments about something else?

To most people who’ve watched tennis’ Hawkeye system or soccer’s goal-line system the response to all this is, What took so long? Fans watching games on TV at home have seen a virtual strike zone for years now, helping them and the homer announcers see accurate results live. The answer: Gambling.

it’s a reach to say that Flames fan watching the Edmonton playoff series in April of 2022 could have foreseen this teardown happening so fast and so brutally to a team that sped out to a 5-1 lead over the Oilers that night. But it did. The only thing making it worse will be an Oilers Stanley Cup win in 2024. 

It’s a sad state for golf fans being denied the best players on a weekly basis or—  even more disappointing— at the majors. There is little indication what format the so-called settlement will entail when it’s finally hammered out between the Tour and LIV. But one thing they can agree on is that none of this is doing anything to please fans or sponsors of the sport.